Lamentations 3:17 my soul is bereft of peace; I have forgotten what happiness is; 18 so I say, “My endurance has perished; so has my hope from the Lord.” 19 Remember my affliction and my wanderings, the wormwood and the gall! 20 My soul continually remembers it and is bowed down within me. 21 But this I call to mind, and therefore I have hope: 22 The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an end 23 they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. 24 “The Lord is my portion,” says my soul, “therefore I will hope in him.” 25 The Lord is good to those who wait for him, to the soul who seeks him.
Psalms 42:4 These things I remember, as I pour out my soul: how I would go with the throng and lead them in procession to the house of God with glad shouts and songs of praise,a multitude keeping festival. 5 Why are you cast down, O my soul, and why are you in turmoil within me? Hope in God; for I shall again praise him,my salvation 6 and my God. My soul is cast down within me; therefore I remember you from the land of Jordan and of Hermon, from Mount Mizar.
Have you ever felt like you had a season of “remembering”? Everywhere you turn, you are having memories come up from the past which you really wish you didn’t have to deal with? I have memories that I wish I could throw away and never have to look at them again, or at least only when I so chose to. But that is not how our brain works, is it? We can have a memory come up out of nowhere! A smell, or a look, a word, or a touch, can spark a memory so quick we can feel blind-sighted and feel like we have taken a few steps backwards in our spiritual walks with God.
However, I have been going back in my memory on purpose this time. Calling to mind things that have happened in my life from the earliest stages till now. It is kind of spooky sometimes to realize how much has changed in 33 years, and how much I imagine will change in the next 33. I have been through quite a bit of pain and turmoil during my life. But, as I was writing in my journal this morning, I realized once again, how God was there right beside me all the way. In Psalms 42;6 I love the Psalmist remembering all the places he had been. To me, these places seem like they are not only far from home but also far from anything! I have felt this way before. The overwhelming feeling of loneliness, being far, far from home and it’s comforts and also far from anything familiar. When I look back at these times, I realize that not only was God there, He was all over me! He covered me better than my father or mother could have ever protected me. He provided for me better than a spouse could ever have provided for me. He counseled me with His word, better than the most costly counsel this world could offer.
God truly has been there through it all. Was it all fun? Absolutely NOT! But, He is faithful. His Mercies never end. His goodness never fails! And I call to my memory His Love for Deanna!
